Malacca, Malaysia
17/10/19
Amidst an array of ethnicities; I sit and await arrival to the first country on my travel list: Malaysia. You may ask, "Why are you going there?" The truth is, I needed to either renew my Visa for Cambodia or go to a neighbouring country for a similar price. I chose the more exciting option...
My brain is going through a natural process of overthinking. "What am I doing?" - This is a regular penny-saver. Another is: "What should I be thinking about?" - The most common response to most of my inner-questions and thoughts is: "Why the f**k not?" At the prime age of 25, I feel that if I did not give myself the chance to experience the exhilarating, but frightening, choice of solo-travelling; when would I?
I have been through a combination of emotions in the past week. It began with a panic attack on Tuesday night, which was brought on from the stress and responsibility of work, and a longing for something new. After an essential conversation with my parents, a decision was made: it's time to move on.
So, following a 3-day 'get-your-mind-back-on-track-and-control-your-emotions' trip; I quit my job. As someone who prides themselves on being dependable, this was a huge decision for me. Nevertheless, through a sea of tears, emotion and a surprising amount of support; I did it.
Before I continue, I want to momentarily refer back to the support I mentioned. I cannot stress enough how fundamental it is to communicate with people about what is happening in your mind. Be it anxiety, panic, sadness or hopefully happiness; there is always someone in your life you can share it with. Find that person/s and help each other, because we are never alone and there is always someone ready and waiting to listen. Myself included.
Now, back to how I got to writing this, whatever it is... Coincidentally both my Visa and accommodation contracts were due for an update, leading me to weigh up my options as stated before. All I knew at this point in time was that in December, currently in October, I would be reunited with my beloved and his family in India. Between now and then there were around 8 weeks of play-time to fill. Goddamit, I was so engrossed in writing I missed the opportunity to spend a penny (as my dear Nanny would say...)
Lesson number one: pee before the plane starts to decent!